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Yeah, it takes a while to rebuild nerve endings for fine motor control.
With an older band, I got to the point where I could play the set straight through without needing to hear anyone. They were originals, and I counted in for every song. I don't know my current band's (cover) songs that well (they don't either), and we're all new at playing with each other, so I can't be that rigid yet. Ideally, I'd like to get back to that level. I hate relying on having to hear everyone perfectly all the time. If I get to a gig and I can't hear them, I'll tell them after the first song and then it's on them to keep up. Not ideal, but neither is losing one of your senses.
I have a similar problem. I discovered, accidentally, that using lighter sticks allows me to lay into the kit. The downside is finding lighter sticks which maintain a similar balance to my normal sticks. They usually end up being shorter in length, which changes some things.
So we went on last night. It was far from perfect. I had to adjust my technique a lot (READ: ease up on how hard I hit) to accommodate the sound system weaknesses. One of my own shortcomings is being able to find a groove when I'm not really laying into the kit.
In the end it came together and I overcame the issues. Even the couple of mistakes didn't hang me up and I pushed through pretty solidly. We had at least three hundred people there, and a lot of them sought me out afterwords to pay a compliment which is nice. You forget how easy it is to impress people who know nothing about drums! LOL
The sound from my kit is what really sold it though. I mean it REALLY filled the room. Rich, thunderous sound. I was so impressed with how it sounded. And the Sledgehammer? Oh my God. It cut through everything...and I mean everything, ripping across the room like a voracious tiger. What a beautiful instrument.